Funny Tombstones

 Hello friends, 

I'm teaching from Ecclesiastes, the ninth chapter today.  In this passage, Solomon, the writer, tells us we all have one thing in common: DEATH!

No matter our skin color, age, if we are rich or poor, sad or happy, we all die. So says the wise king.

Oh wow! He's right, of course, but talk about a morbid subject! I decided I needed to bring a bit of light heartedness to my class, so I looked up people who died with a sense of humor. Here are a few epithets they left us to enjoy.

What will your obit say? Will you have something special engraved on your tombstone?

Hubby and I have ours in place. I have an angel on my side of the thing, and he has a church on his side. I write angel stories, and he's been a preacher all his life.  We've also included Scripturas. His is Romans 8:28 and mine is Philippians 4:13.

The date of demise isn't there, 

and I hope it isn't there for a long time to come.

As challenging as life is at times, 

it's still a good thing.

FAITH AND HUMOR

 

I recently taught the Book of Job from the Old Testament. I didn’t want to teach it, but it was scheduled. I suggested to my class that we study another book, something simple, like Hebrews, but  unfortunately, they wanted old Job and his troubles.

Of Course, I jest. If you’ve studied Hebrews, you know it’s not simple. Good, but it’s complicated. Job is rather complicated, too.

I’m in a dark place in my own life. The last thing I needed  was to add sadness through my Bible studies, but I plunged into it. Wow! Talk about suffering. That poor guy got major whammies. Our situations may not be as dramatic as his, but they are as intense to US! Can you visualize the five-year-old who was abandoned at the Texas border? He doesn’t understand the language, why he’s there, and he wants his mother.  Is it possible to identify with the one vanishing with cancer? How about the family losing income and home? Or the sorrow of supporting the dying child?

 Job asked questions, but God didn’t answer them. Instead, He interrogated Job! When He finished with His suffering servant, God told Job’s friends, “I’m mad at you.”  Oops! Scary! When we give advice to friends, let us remember it might not meet God’s approval.

 Before the whammies, Job was the one of the richest men on earth. He lived the good life. After the whammies, the poor man tried to understand what he’d done to deserve the sorrow. Job came to realize He should love the Lord for who He is and not the blessings and gifts He gives.

 Thanks Job. I’m sorry you went through all that, but the lesson God taught you blessed me.

Live Till You Die

Burials come with huge price tags. Can you believe this? A funeral home raised prices and blamed it on the cost of living. If the cost of living is expensive, why is it so popular?

Staying alive is pricey, but no one wants to voluntarily climb into the casket or cremation oven.

Speaking of caskets, my brother-in-law officiated at the graveside for a funeral. He walked backwards as he led the casket processional. He read Psalms to the bereaved family. He was unaware he'd reached the final destination. When he fell into the casket's hole, he stopped reading and yelled, "Get me out of here, let me out, right now, get me out!

This same preacher, at another funeral, didn't check the direction of the wind. The family had asked him to scatter the beloved's ashes. When he emptied the urn, the grandma's ashes flew all over him. He coughed, sputtered, and brushed his clothes as if the devil himself was on him. The family was not impressed.

Another preacher, and this one isn't a relative, went with the family to bury ashes. He tells how a family member dropped the urn carrying the remains. The urn rolled down the hillside. The whole family, kit-and-caboodle, ran ran after the urn, yelling, "Get Grandma."

Children don't always understand funerals and who should be buried. A neighbor saw little Johnny digging a big hole. He asked, "What are you doing?  Huge eyes looked up and little Johnny replied, "I'm burying my goldfish."  The neighbor said, "That's a big hole for a tiny fish." Little Johnny replied, "I know, but my fish is inside your cat."

Oops!

A verse penned by the Apostle Paul reminds us that we leave this life to live in a different place.

We are confident, I say, and willing rather to be absent from the body, and to be present with the Lord. (2 Cor. 5:8)

Although our eternal home is far better than this present life, I prefer to stay here a lot longer.

I write books featuring faith and humor. You can see a total list on Amazon.

One of my books, Family Secrets is on sale at Smashwords, but you must go there to buy. 

Family Secrets on Smashwords

Gay N. Lewis on Amazon

Faith and Humor

    HAPPY READING!